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[May. 13th, 2003|08:16 pm]
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frydgreenvelvet, I couldn't see your e-mail address on your user page. So if you still want to beta, could you do it in a comment here? Thanks!

Title: To Drown in a Sea of Tears

Pairing: Implied John/Bobby. Post X2, so spoilers.

Rating: PG

Summary: Kurt can only watch. And pray.

Disclaimer: None of them are mine. Although I wouldn't mind having John, Bobby and Kurt for my very own.

Alkali Lake changed everything. Kurt was not even a part of the group before that, and he can still tell that everything is different from the way it was before.

Most of it is because of Jean, of course. Scott has barely left his room since they got back, and although Kurt does not know him very well, does not know how he was before, he has heard the others whispering in concern, which is enough to tell him that this behaviour is not like Scott at all.

Wolverine has withdrawn even more into himself than ever. He rarely speaks, and spends most of his time in the Danger Room, exercising his body so that he won't have to think - or remember. And Kurt has found Ororo crying on more than one occasion. He does what little he can for her, but he is not convinced that he is really helping. So he prays for them all, that their hearts may be healed, and he tries to bring comfort where he can.

But it is Bobby Drake who worries him most of all, and there, he can bring no comfort at all. Young Bobby has a deep grief of his own, that the staff do not share. Oh, he mourns for Jean, of course, like everybody else - but she was just his teacher. And she was not his only, or his most grievous, loss, that day.

For Bobby, also, has lost his best friend. And he does not even have the consolation of knowing that John acted for the best in leaving - he must live with the knowledge that John abandoned them all to fly away with Mystique and Magneto. Kurt suspects that there was, perhaps, something more than friendship between the boys, although on whose part he cannot tell. But he will not condemn. Whatever the truth, there was love there, on both sides, and Kurt knows about love. He also knows what suffering it brings when it is gone.

John Allerdyce has flown beyond their reach. And from what he saw as the jet was landing outside that house in Boston, Kurt knows John's rage could burn down the world, if he wanted it to. But there is nothing to be done about that, now, except wait and pray that he returns of his own free will.

Bobby is still here, and needs help. Kurt has heard him sobbing, sometimes, at night, when he passes the boys' room - and he watched Bobby screaming at the staff, when they tried to take John's things away. Bobby believes that his friend just made a mistake, and that he will return to them soon. Kurt is not so sure. He wishes he knew what to do, how to make it better. Rogue tries to help, tries with all she has, but there is only so much comfort you can give when you cannot touch the one who needs it.

Kurt prays for Bobby, and for John, and for guidance. He has told Storm of his concerns, and he hopes the staff will be able to help. Because he fears for Bobby. He fears that if nothing is done, Bobby will drown in a sea of his own tears and be lost to them - and it will happen soon.

He dreads the thought of losing another of his new friends. And he does not think he can prevent it alone.

He can only wait, and watch helplessly, and pray that someone helps Bobby, before it is too late. Because if nobody does, he fears that the boy will follow his friend into Magneto's welcoming arms.

And be damned.
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Comments:
[User Picture]
From:gypsyjr
Date:May 13th, 2003 - 01:51 pm
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*sniff* Awww.
From:frydgreenvelvet
Date:May 14th, 2003 - 04:28 am
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Oh oh ohhh.

Sweetness! I cant think of anything that needs improving, at all.

The best bits:

Kurt suspects that there was, perhaps, something more than friendship between the boys, although on whose part he cannot tell. But he will not condemn.
V. fitting with all we know of the character(movie-wise at least), I think. I love it when the little details are included. This also applied to the ending.

and he watched Bobby screaming at the staff, when they tried to take John's things away This made me want to cry. You can picture it, and feel the tearing. "screaming" is espec. effective, because you only really scream when the emotions are deepest. Aww!

Rogue tries to help, tries with all she has, but there is only so much comfort you can give when you cannot touch the one who needs it. Sad angst, all around! I want to hug them all.

The view through Kurt's eyes and telling us what he feels and thinks somehow is a really good vehicle to get into the other character's heads. Im not sure why, but probably because hes such a lovely empathic (fuzzy blue) darling.

**applause!!**
[User Picture]
From:celebros
Date:May 14th, 2003 - 09:33 am

*cries*

(Link)
It's gorgeous. It's a picture painted of words, as all of your works seem to be. My favorite parts?

A. And he does not even have the consolation of knowing that John acted for the best in leaving - he must live with the knowledge that John abandoned them all to fly away with Mystique and Magneto.

B. Describing how Logan, Scott, and Ororo reacted.

C. Everything else.
[User Picture]
From:randomfrog
Date:May 14th, 2003 - 03:30 pm
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That was wonderful. Favorite part-
Kurt knows John's rage could burn down the world, if he wanted it to.